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Guess Hu’s Coming to Dinner, A blog by Mei Lan Wong and Kevin Jackson

What went pretty much unnoticed about Obama hosting China’s President Hu was the guest list.  There were the usual suspects like former Speaker Nancy Pelosi and her newly appointed suck-up Steny Hoyer, their invitation being payback for their throwing themselves on the hand grenade of Eviction 2010.

Defense Secretary Robert Gates earned his way to the gala by allowing the Chinese to enter sovereign U.S. waters and fire off a test missile. Nice touch, Barry! On the other hand, Geitner’s appearance is a mystery, considering he was the guy who led the Asian financial meltdown in the 90’s. Perhaps an Obama passive aggressive move?

Jeffrey Immelt from GE attended, but that’s an easy read, since GE pays less taxes than ever by…sending jobs to China. Not to be outdone, Obama suckup and head of DOW chemical Andrew M. Liveries also has big plans for China.

Industry suckups represented, the Obamas moved down the list to “Lapdogs.” David Ignatius from the Washington Post was happy to fill that slot. Ignatius will undoubtedly write positively about Obama’s economic and diplomatic failures.

Let’s not forget the perfect blend of capitalism and Hollyweird, which is why the CEO of Disney Robert Iger was invited. The connection?  Mulan and Mulan II.

The unions were well represented as they are at all Democrat White House dinners, this time Robert King, head of the UAW filled that seat. King’s attendance could have been negotiated when GM sold Hummer to China.  It is said that King talked Hu’s ears off about unionizing China’s workforce, Hu stood up at the table, pounded his chest and shouted, “China ahleady communist, damnit…I King Kong way up here.”

That’s pretty much it for the non-Chinese invitees.  Now the rest of the story.

In what should be considered an insult, Obama seemed to do a casting call for a gay Bruce Lee movie. One Chinese-American fashionista Vera Wang made the cut. Apparently Michelle Obama will not be outdone by Chelsea Clinton’s dress, MO saying, “Oh hell to the no! I am not going to have Malia and Sasha outdone by Chelsea on their wedding day!”

Next on the list was Yo Yo Ma, the famous Chinese cellist. Every party needs a good cellist. I guess there were no Chinese cellist in DC, so Obama imported one from Burbank, CA. Thankfully, America doesn’t have any restrictive immigration laws for allowing state to state importation of Chinese dissidents.

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Lang Lang, the famous Chinese penis…I mean “pianist” performed an anti-America song, “Battle on Shangganling Mountain“, where the U.S. is portrayed as jackals. Did Obama know?

Famous Chinese ice skater Michelle Kwan made it to the soiree. It’s a shame she didn’t wear a Vera Lang ice skating outfit, in the style of the Chinese flag.

Sans sidekick Chris Tucker, famous crossover Hong Kong martial arts action star Jackie Chan was there to kick it with BO and MO.  Chan made a film titled, “My Name is Not Bruce,”  because Chan is from Hong Kong where they speak Cantonese, not Mandarin—Bruce Lee’s and Hu’s native tongue. Did someone forget to tell Obama that rather important piece of information? Apparently for Liberals, Chinese is Chinese! Where’s Hillary with the “easy” button when you need it.

I thought state dinners were really for renewing or securing diplomatic ties? So, will someone please tell me how on earth is having Michelle Kwon ice skating in a Vera Wang outfit to Yo Yo Ma and Lang Lang playing “Kung Fu Fighting, while simultaneously trying to avoid Jackie Chan kicks has to do with securing diplomatic ties?  At least all the Chinese invitees were legal Americans, even if so will take American secrets back to China.

Missing notables?

Where in the heck was Lucy Liu? I bet she would have gotten an invitation if her name was Liu Liu. Speaking of Liu Liu, where was the panda, Ling Ling?  Talk about the perfect guest, a half-black/white animal native to China. And what about Yao Ming?  He is China’s best gift to the U.S.  If anyone epitomizes diplomatic ties between the US and China, Yao Ming is the 7’6” poster giant!

Here’s the wrap:

The rest of the list of Chinese dinner guests were some unrecognizable Chinese people. You get the feeling that the White House just needed to pair up Wongs and Dongs to the long list of American elitist pricks and dicks on Obama’s staff.

Inviting a bunch of Chinese-American people to a state dinner who have no political interest is insulting. There are many Chinese-Americans who do not believe in communism, nor do they appreciate the murder of millions of people who were killed by the communist regime.

I guess nowadays ideologies don’t really matter. Money talks.  China has it, Obama needs it.

Happy Chinese New Year!

© 2011 Kevin Jackson – The Black Sphere, LLC – All Rights Reserved

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