Obama’s Biggest Secret

Obama’s Biggest Secret, by Kevin Jackson

It is common knowledge that we know very little about Barack Obama. He came out of nowhere. If you decide to dig into his history—or lack thereof—it just gets more weird.

Most people believe that Obama may be hiding his country of birth or perhaps his grades. Others believe Obama’s past may reveal something even more sinister, like he’s the Manchurian candidate hell bent on the destruction of America.  There is even speculation that Obama may swing both ways, and he’s practicing political Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.

All good theories; but none reveals Obama’s biggest skeleton in the closet.

Obama doesn’t have many true friends, so he has come to dote on family.   Toots, Uncle Onyango, Aunt Zeituni, Michelle, his daughters and his mother-in-law have all benefitted from Barack.  Barack believes in nepotism and therein lies the hint of what is potentially Obama’s biggest scandal.

You might be thinking about Barack having put Michelle Obama in charge of thinning the American herd of fatties.  Giving Michelle a job justifies her 22-person, multi-million dollar entourage, and her many taxpayer funded boondoggles.  Obama listed his daughters as “senior staff” for their African jaunt, which included uncles, aunts, and cousins.  Egregious acts by anybody’s standards; however mere pittances for what Obama has done to us under our very noses.

But here is the real scoop. Like Reverend Jesse Jackson, Obama’s biggest secret is he fathered a love child.  And as salacious as this revelation may be, the plot thickens, because Obama’s love child is white.

You need to understand that Obama came out of nowhere, because he is a jumper—a person who travels through time. Like vampires, jumpers have been around for eons. They jump through the fabric of time messing things up.

Think about it.  Obama has NO friends from his past who remember him from college, and there are only eight photos of the guy on all of Google prior to him entering government.  Don’t believe me, Google it.  The picture in the park with him grandparents, one or two with his mom, one or two with his supposed dad, and then the one where he’s smoking cigarettes.  That about it.  Pictures of Obama are more rare a black Republican.

Obama has no real work history either. Who graduates from Harvard with a Juris Doctorate degree, president of Law Review, supposedly Magna Cum Laude and goes to work as a community organizer? Only somebody with felonies. This is how I know Obama is a jumper.

When Obama appointed Biden as Vice President, many of us were scratching our head.  Biden is a dolt of the highest order. How could somebody supposedly so brilliant as Obama is said to be, choose somebody so stupid to be his number two? You wouldn’t.

Unless Biden is Obama KID! To quote the first black Vice President, “This is a big f’g deal!”

It’s actually a brilliant strategy for Obama to make his progeny VP, because it would take somebody really clever to figure it out.  Yes there were hints that Biden is a carrier of Obama genes, but we missed them. All the while we believed Biden to be the “elder statesman,” since Obama appears to be younger than Biden. But when you realize that Obama is a jumper, it all suddenly makes sense, doesn’t it?

What president wouldn’t have thrown Biden under the bus by now, if Biden weren’t family?

Biden behaves like a precocious 3-year old in the checkout lane with Mommy. He says things like, “Mommy said she gonna kill daddy if he doesn’t stop screwing Mrs Crenshaw.

Who says that another person would be a better choice for VP, as Biden said of Hillary? And in speaking to members of the House Democratic caucus who were gathered in Williamsburg, Va., for their annual retreat, Feb. 6, 2009 Biden said this:

If we do everything right, if we do it with absolute certainty, there’s still a 30% chance we’re going to get it wrong.”

Really?  If Biden and Papa O know the future, they still have a 30% chance they will screw it up? Apparently hindsight isn’t 20/20 for the O’Bidens.

Now that you know the truth, you realize that Biden got that “Gaffe Gene” from Barack. Obama’s selection of Biden was a way to keep Biden close; Obama and Biden were protecting the family secret.

Now the real question is who is Biden’s real mother?  Let’s just say that Obama is keeping her close as well, just in case Biden needs to breastfed at 3A in the morning.

That’s my rant!

© 2011 Kevin Jackson – The Black Sphere, LLC – All Rights Reserved

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