G.I. Joe > Gun Nut

The waiting room was empty as I had requested, but the front staff kept walking to the front door and peeking nervously outside.

I assumed they were keeping an eye out for a wandering patient that didn’t make an appointment. I have a dog that is huge and is deemed a “bully breed”, so I try to be conscious that he is kept away from yummy Yorkies and crunchy Chihuahuas. Since it was time for him to have his shots and have an injury looked at, I had made an appointment and warned them of his possible discrimination towards smaller breeds being mistaken for squeak toys.

After about the twentieth trip to peer out the front door, I finally got curious enough to ask what was going on.

“Oh we are just making sure that those crazy gun nuts next door don’t get in our few parking spaces.”

That’s right, there is a gun store and shooting range next door. Lately I have noticed no less than 30 V8 monster trucks parked in the front decked out with NRA and Romney stickers. In comparison with the 15 smart cars and Volvos at the Panera Bread down the street. I’m not making discriminating remarks against Panera Bread here, because I trust me; I can get downright evil on a Roasted Artichoke Turkey Panini. But automatically branding (or is it more appropriate to say semi-automatically branding) those parking at the gun store as “crazy gun nuts” is far worse than my “Pansy Palates Panini People” comments.

Gun Nuts

So they are really a problem?” I questioned just to keep conversation going a little and relieve me of waiting room boredom. I was pretty sure I wouldn’t enjoy any more of her insights, but it was better than rereading the poster on the wall about canine gingivitis one more time.

“All those men being loud and carrying their big guns on their shoulders scare our customers and myself. They should have put that place on the outskirts of town and then they could be as G.I. Joe as they wanted and let us feel safe.”

I probably should have just kept reading about tooth decay and gum disease in Spot’s mouth. Brush Spot Brush. Floss Spot Floss. See Spot Brush and Floss.

Well, at least you will probably never get broken into or robbed with all those ‘NUTS’ carrying on outside.

Shockingly, she nodded her agreement and left the room to wipe up another poodle puddle or something more pressing than shooting unloaded glances at G.I. Joe.

Wait a minute…

Those big bad guys are so scary with their big bad scary guns, yet you feel safer having them nearby? Liberal logic at its finest, folks.

What is with this feeling that being legally stripped of your right to bear arms is making a safer world for you? Why do you deduce that if your neighbors no longer have access to guns that you now live in a safer location?

I just don’t get this line of thinking.





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