The San Diego Mayoral ‘Little Boy’s Room’ Controversy

San Diego mayoral raceCongressional candidate Carl DeMaio, former San Diego City Council member and 2012 mayoral hopeful, called the accusations that he regularly excused himself from San Diego City Council Chambers to masturbate in the bathroom “disgusting, humiliating and nothing more than a character assassination attempt.”

DeMaio made the statement in response to allegations in a “Voice of Orange County” article that he spent more time taming his member than he did council-ing members.

Former city council member/current Democratic State Senator Ben Hueso claims that in 2009, everyone from city officials to the media knew that Mr. DeMaio, a Republican, wasn’t in the restroom because of an overactive bladder or a need to readjust his boxer briefs.

Oh no, says Mr. Hueso, DeMaio would regularly excuse himself from Council Chambers to go masturbate in the bathroom.

Even though Mr. DeMaio’s face is void of pimples, it should be duly noted that 1) he does not, I repeat, does not wear glasses, so he isn’t even close to being blind; and 2) his palms are hair-free.

Nonetheless, appalled at Hueso’s accusations, and despite the supportive evidence of good eyesight and hairless palms, Mr. DeMaio chose to submit himself to a polygraph test to prove that his trips to the restroom had nothing to do with self-pleasuring.

Polygraph examiner Paul Redden concluded that DeMaio, when asked whether he ever excused himself to masturbate in the Little Boy’s Room and whether Mr. Hueso ever walked in while he was doing so, was “not attempting deception when he answered ‘no’ to the above relevant questions.”

On behalf of DeMaio, attorney Robert Ottilie sent a letter to the “Voice of Orange County” demanding the publication issue a correction of the article accusing Mr. DeMaio of frequenting the restroom to relieve himself in an inappropriate manner.

Mr. DeMaio himself said:

In politics, you see people make accusations all the time. And you know, I’ve had people criticize me before and I usually let it roll off my back. But this one crosses the line. It’s so gross. It’s so false, that I have to speak out. I have to present the truth.

DeMaio plans to run against newly-elected Democratic Rep. Scott Peters in San Diego’s 52nd Congressional District, and feels that a fabricated story that was put to rest back in 2009 was “shopped around” during a heated mayoral race with disgraced Mayor Bob ‘Filthy’ Filner in October 2012.

“Local papers in San Diego saw it for being a lie and dismissed it,” DeMaio said, “and now, conveniently the timing, of bringing it out right as a new mayoral race starts. It’s very clear what this is.”

DeMaio blames Hueso and organized labor for starting the rumor.  Ignoring DeMaio’s denials, Hueso is sticking to his story.  He even cited former Councilmember Tony Young, who Hueso claims has personally been privy to one of Mr. DeMaio’s restroom masturbation sessions.

In response to Hueso pulling Mr. Young into the controversy, Tony issued a statement today saying:

“During my tenure with the city I never witnessed Mr. DeMaio do anything inappropriate as a member of the City Council.”

Unfortunately, that could easily mean that Tony Young did see DeMaio pleasuring himself in the bathroom, because in liberal circles masturbating in public is not necessarily considered “inappropriate.”  In fact, it could place one in high regard.

The absurdity of the accusation is that if the Republican Mr. DeMaio was in fact masturbating in the men’s room with regularity, one would think Democrats would make every effort to hide it from their constituency.  As a Democrat, Hueso would never try to shame someone for such a thing because, after all, masturbation is a behavior liberals heartily endorse.

Which means that in Democrat circles DeMaio’s compulsive masturbating would likely garner him more votes, not threaten his candidacy.

That’s why, if Carl DeMaio is the masturbatory giant Ben Hueso claims he is, when Democrats go to vote, Carl’s extracurricular trips to the john could handily deliver the Republican mayoral hopeful a respectable victory.

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