Gay Mafia involved in Michael Sam pick

There is good news about the Rams drafting the first openly gay player, Michael Sam former linebacker for the University of Missouri. The proximity of the team to Sam’s home town will make it easier for Sam to return home, when the Rams find out that he sucks; as a football player, I hasten to add!

Sam was drafted number 249 in the seventh and final round, which was only about eight slots higher than my deceased grandmother!

When is the last time anybody given a crap about a player drafted number 249 in the seventh round? Of course you don’t remember, because it doesn’t happen.

But there Sam was, with enough media coverage to make Obama jealous. They were ready to “make history,” as soon as the announcement of his team was made. In the real “NOT Gay” world, there would be no media coverage of a mediocre football player whose real chance of being drafted were slim to none.

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The Rams drew the short straw, and some fat cat gay donor to Obama, called the Gay Mafia, who promptly call its president Barack Obama when then forced the Rams to take the Sodomite.

“With the 249th pick, the St. Louis Rams pick…that gay guy nobody knows, and who we will have to figure out how to cut, without any blowback {pardon the pun}!”

After the “shocking” news, Sam promptly kissed his boyfriend, a mousy white dude. Can you say, “STAGED!”

The rest as they say is “history.”

The endorsement deals are already POURING IN, according to reports.

Michael Sam has signed a deal with Visa, giving the openly gay football player and NFL hopeful his first corporate endorsement.

“Judge me for running a 4.91 at the combine, for a blown tackle on the outside rush,” Sam says in the ad, while bench pressing. “Or holding fourth and goal with your team’s wild-card berth on the line. Remember me for sending you home with tears of joy or tears of sorrow. Judge me for what I do on the field.”

Endorsements for a guy who will likely not play a down of “NOT Gay” football.

What would football have done without its first openly gay player? The sport was doomed until this moment, we are being told. America was doomed as well! This was a huge moment, so huge that even the White House chimed in.

“The President congratulates Michael Sam, the Rams and the NFL for taking an important step forward in our Nation’s journey…From the playing field to the corporate boardroom, LGBT Americans prove everyday that you should be judged by what you do and not who you are.”

As we all know, there have been other gay football players, just not “openly” gay. The “closed” gay players all got drafted on this thing known as talent.

Sports were once a meritocracy, where one relied on talent, regardless of ethnicity, religion, and so on.

I know I don’t care about players’ sexuality in sport.

I would watch a 5’0, 450 pound Muslim woman from Kazakhstan, if she can run over linebackers like Earl Campbell. – Kevin Jackson

And if stubby little fat babe’s skills transfer to the hard court, I’d pay to see her stuff some seven foot center, and I would cheer for her like a sissy at a Clay Aiken concert.

I’m not sure what St. Louis got to become the freak show of the NFL, but that is exactly where the Rams find themselves. Sports are no longer being played on fields or in arenas, but instead in social experimentation labs. One can only imagine what sports will become over the next fifty years.

At least we can check off two boxes for “openly” gay: pro basketball, pro football. When will baseball, soccer, lacrosse, ping pong, badminton, curling…ok all other sports catch up? They all need to get at least one mediocre athlete to come out and get what’s coming to him.

© The Black Sphere, LLC – Kevin Jackson – All Rights Reserved

 

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