Why Stormy Daniels Took Her Stripper Act to the Border
And why shouldn’t a porn star hustle down to the Mexican border to rescue those neglected Mexican children? I’m actually surprised Daniels didn’t try to save the FBI, disgraced former FBI Director James Comey, McCabe, and Strzok, before high-tailing it to the border.
As Daniels arrives at the border, I picture a modern-day version of the Underground Railroad, with Spanish subtitles.
But in this updated version of the story, Stormy Daniels sneaks illegal Mexican children into American one by one…by “keestering” them.
Keestering is the way crooks get contraband into the prison or elsewhere. After all, what security wants to actually look up the crack of another man’s ass to see if he’s holding? In the case of Daniels, we all know that’s one big anal cavity.
Here’s how it works.
Daniels loads up a Mexican child, asking them to grab on to her butt cheeks, then slide inside. Then Daniels calmly saunters across the border into America.
And as soon as she gets safely across the border, she farts the little Mexican out of her ass and picks up her paycheck from La Raza and heads back over.
Why wait around, when there are so many Mexicans and only one A-hole big enough to get the job done, and that’s Daniels’ well-worn rectum.
According to The Hill,
Stormy Daniels, the adult-film star who is suing President Trump and his former personal attorney, Michael Cohen, says she is heading to the border to offer assistance to migrants.
“I am headed down in a week,” Daniels tweeted on Thursday to a user asking her to help children impacted by President Trump’s “zero tolerance” immigration policies. “Don’t worry. Just figuring out my best course of action to maximize my resources.”
I am headed down in a week. Don't worry. Just figuring out my best course of action to maximize my resources. https://t.co/kT64pWZ4QN
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) June 21, 2018
Maximize her resources?
Rectum stretches, perhaps. So she can hide the 17-year olds?
I’d like to know when the children of Mexican illegals became a priority for the porn queen.
Maybe Stormy is going to the border to meet with some of the young men? After a long journey like that, those youngster could use the pleasure of a woman. I’m sure that Stormy could teach them a thing or two, right after she finishes her twerking seminar for the 6 and under girls.
But Daniels isn’t the only person going to the border. According to the article, her attorney will join:
Daniels’s tweet comes the same day her lawyer, Michael Avenatti, announced that he’s representing whistleblowers within Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE).
“We are now representing whistleblowers within ICE, outside contractors, etc. They have reached out to us to provide us with info as to what is really going on,” Avenatti tweeted.
We are now representing whistleblowers within ICE, outside contractors, etc. They have reached out to us to provide us with info as to what is really going on. We are going to blow this wide open and take the info to the American people so they can decide what happens next.
— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) June 21, 2018
A Porn Star and her Lawyer to the rescue!
Or is this Stormy Daniels and her Democrat shill lawyer looking for another chance at a payday. Remember, they’ve gotten nothing so far.
Daniels had been radio-silent for weeks, and her attorney under fire. One could wonder who put them up to this. The combination of porn star and children even tests the sensibilities of Leftists.
Perhaps the Left’s recalled their declaration that Stormy Daniels would singlehandedly “take down” the president?
“Ultimately, he is going to be forced to resign,” said Michael Avenatti, the attorney for the adult film actor who says she had an affair with Donald Trump and was paid by Trump’s lawyer, Michael Cohen, to keep it quiet.
“I don’t know how he will ultimately spin his departure, but I firmly believe there is going to be too much evidence of wrongdoing by him and those around him for him to be able to survive the balance of his term.”
Stormy Daniels has a better chance of First Lady than that happening.
And my bet is Daniels will soon be out of money, and forced to drop her case against Donald “I wasn’t even President at the time” Trump.
This won’t stop some Leftists from continuing to go after Trump. However, their cases get weaker by the moment. And it doesn’t help that the people pursuing impeachment are bat sh*t crazy.
— AM Joy w/Joy Reid (@amjoyshow) March 11, 2018
Sadly, the Left want Trump impeached so bad they then illegally raided Trump’s lawyer’s office in search of documentation over the alleged payment to Daniels.
FBI agents raided the office and residences of Michael Cohen, President Donald Trump’s longtime personal attorney.
The search reportedly included, possibly among other things, documents related a $130,000 payment to Stormy Daniels, which Cohen made just days before the 2016 election. Daniels, an adult film actress, says she had an affair with Trump in 2006.
But has anyone seen such documentation stating Trump and his lawyer did something illegal? Me neither.
The clock ticks on Daniels’ 15 minutes of fame. Soon she won’t receive any keys to the city.
— The Hill (@thehill) May 24, 2018
What’s next for Daniels?
Perhaps she will sign with Disney adding a stripper character to their future kid films?
Or maybe she’ll write her own memoir in the form of a children’s book detailing her struggles of learning to climb up and down the proverbial ladder. In her case, it’s a stripper pole.
Don’t be surprised if America finds itself flooded with Latin American strippers…with fake blonde wigs.