All the Things We’re Not Supposed to Say Before the Election

I find it quite interesting that people want to criticize the timing of the Hunter Biden email dump. According to Democrats, this isn’t the kind of thing you put out there before the big day.

I disagree. This is EXACTLY what we need to put out there before election day.

Why in the world would we hide the kind of man Joe Biden really is? But that’s precisely what liberals want us to do. The way I heard it, Facebook, Twitter, and the rest of the mainstream media did their best to squash the story. Efforts were made to suppress posts that mentioned Joe, Hunter, Biden, emails, Bursima, and other leftist trigger words.

Now, I can’t prove it. But I can say that I’ve been on Kevin Jackson’s team for four years. And I would also say I’ve developed a certain expertise in reading analytics. There’s an expected boost any time we post something new. And oddly enough, when we first commented on this Biden scandal, we didn’t see a boost. Instead, we saw a dip. How did that happen? I’ll leave it to you to decide.

So, what are these new “pre-election rules” for dealing with the Bidens?

10. Never ask Joe Biden to explain how his wife died. His story? Drunk driver. True story? His wife ran a stop-sign in a possible murder-suicide plot driven by post-pardum depression. Why did Biden need to pad the tragedy with an extra plot-twist? Maybe to cover for his poor performance as a freshman in Congress. But we can’t ask him about that little fib. Even if it did soil a good man’s reputation. (By good man, we mean the driver of the other vehicle involved in that horrific event.)

9. Don’t ask Joe where he went to college. Maybe it was the University of Delaware. Maybe it was Delaware State. Hell, maybe it was Harvard. I’m pretty sure he was at the top of his class, unless of course, he wasn’t. But Biden definitely graduated with three degress. Wait, maybe he meant one. All in all, it was paid for by a fancy scholarship. Based on merit. Scratch that. Based on financial need.

8. Please do not second guess Biden’s economic plan. He promised to create an economy built around the working man. He spent 47 years perfecting his plan. And he finally accomplished it, well, never. We were left with the worst economic recovery since the Great Depression. Again, Biden owes no explanation for his actions. Or lack there of.

7. Biden claims he’ll finally get tough on China. In reality, his son tried to secure the future wealth of every Biden yet to come with his plans to sell access to US government. Of course, this scandal is brand spanking new, so please, let’s be sure we don’t mention it in front of the old creep. Or on social media.

6. Obama just barely started campaigning for Biden. Ever wonder why? If the bromance was real, and the respect reciprocal, what took Obama so long? Is it possible that Biden is even worse than his former boss? So bad that Obama doesn’t want the word association of their names to follow him the rest of his days. But don’t expect Joe to offer an insight there.

5. Biden promised a cure for cancer. “I promise you if I’m elected president, you’re going to see the single most important thing that changes America,” Biden announced in June. “We’re gonna cure cancer.” Experts cringe when they hear this rubbish. As they’ll point out, there are more than 100 different KNOWN types of cancer. There are more we’ve yet to find. And mutations- this disease is ever-changing. It’s going to take decades to make a dent. Surely, if Biden had that kind of power, he would have employed it to save his beloved son, Beau. Yet, again, this is something we just don’t ask the former VP to explain.

4. Forget Burisma. Hunter Biden was kicked out of the Navy and landed a cushy job making a fortune for a company he knew nothing about. Then, he went around introducing Daddy when it produced another payout. And Biden actually bragged about his successful extortion efforts. But, it’s all okay, because Biden hails from the scandal-free administration. And we shouldn’t ask Biden about it, because he already blamed Donald Trump instead.

3. Don’t mention the family. Biden’s younger brother, James, once secured some pretty fishy bank loans and opened a night club. The whole thing went belly up. Of course, Biden publicly banned the mainstream media from “attacking the family” recently. In other words, don’t ask, don’t tell. Especially this close to D-Day.

2. Promises made, promises Kept. That’s a motto Donald Trump holds dear. But don’t ask Biden what it means. He’s lied about the Affordable Health Care Act, NAFTA, Tara Reade, his IQ, plaigarism, his ancestry, and countless other endeavors. But never, ever ask Biden to explain these falsehoods. They’re simply the normal memory lapses often experienced by dinosaurs.

And last, but certainly not least—- NEVER EVER EVER ask Biden how he plans to beat Donald Trump. He doesn’t know. Neither does anyone else.

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